carnagecarnival: (I wish I’d just stood and let.)
The Initiate Fraysong ♑ (Young GHB) ([personal profile] carnagecarnival) wrote in [community profile] thearena2014-06-18 02:12 pm

Don't fret precious my dear, step away from the window, go back to sleep

Who| Initiate and Kain, Justin & Sigma, Elsa, Orc, and Di (all separate times and threads). ALSO OPEN.
What| DEATH AND MURDER ALL THE WAY THROUGH. Also zombie-family.
Where| The forest/orchard, the amusement park, wherever
When| Week Four! And maybe onward???
WARNINGS| Gore, violence, death, desecration of corpses, language, Initiate, so on

When the people start emerging from the fog, wandering, lost, he doesn't think much of it at first. Sometimes they brought motherfuckers in part way through these things. New blood, new faces. He watches a few pass, keeping low. Maybe "thinking nothing of it" is understating. It's hard not to grow a little suspicious when person after person passes with that same blank-faced, glassy-eyed look. He finds himself gripping his weapon a little tighter than before, eyes narrowed.

But then, just as easy, just as quick, he forgets all that. From the fog emerges a new form, this one with horns. He knows those horns. He would know them if all he were a motherfucker struck blind.

His descendant emerges, looking lost, but it ain't that different than how all he'd been, it ain't that different at all. Just like there were harsh administrations done painful is all just--

He's rolled off the food stand roof he'd been perched on and is landing hard on his feet before he even gets the thought in pan to get such actions done. He's pulled like a fish on a hook, feet picking up speed and carrying him along and then he's there, before him, the descendant he'd never meet without the Capitol (and never have with it).

"Gamzee!" He shouts at the kid. "GAMZEE!" His hands are on the kid's shoulders, shaking him. Gamzee doesn't respond. He stares blankly up at the Initiate, like he doesn't recognize him.

"Motherfucker, speak!" He doesn't. Gamzee doesn't make a sound. He just continues staring blankly right on through. There's a strange hollow feeling in him that the Initiate is only half sure he recognizes. His expression makes to twist but he stops it and hardens it all, making himself colder. He slides the pack off his shoulders and slips it on Gamzee easy, kneeling as he does so. He makes sure it's on good, gives Gamzee's shoulders one more pat as he stares into the kid's unseeing eyes. Then, in a few awkward but quick motions, he gets his descendant's bone thin arms wrapped up around his neck and hoists up the kid's legs, carrying the boy on his back. Gamzee's head rests on his shoulder, his curly hair getting up in front of his eyes and in his paint, but not a thing is evinced, no change in expression at all, just a mere blinking.

He knows a place he can keep the boy safe, deep in the Not-Carnival. Safe in a place where all he can make to come back to. For the first time in any arena, he gets the thought in him to try and beat all everyone. But not for his own self. It'll be easy. Just a quick raking of claws along his own throat. Then, maybe, it could work.

In the back of his mind still cries the Alternian rule; he's a detriment, it's dangerous, he's been made invalid, he's just wiggler bratt, he should be culled, it is duty, It's his duty as subjugglator. He should be culled.

Alternia could get pailed.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (Cause I'm a hopeless wanderer)

Re: Disciple

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-19 08:25 pm (UTC)(link)
It happens before her mind can process it. He's there and then he isn't, her reflexes too shot to follow his movements. There's a monster and then there isn't. Skull split, head torn off and tossed, it's dead, gone, no more threat. Her mind processes this. The strange combination of arena food and dead insect hasn't exactly made her thoughts the sharpest or easiest to follow. Not that she would even realize that's why.

"...I don't think Terezi would have blaimed you." Because that's all she can think of. Are they that close, saving her? It must be Terezi, must be something else. Or perhaps they ended on a better note than she recalled, with their last conversation. She grabs the branch she's sitting on and lets herself slide, swing, dangle for a moment before the leg she has finds the ground.

The pain is still screeching but her mind has more strange things to worry about than that. Or perhaps shock is finally settling in and she can't really process it. Maybe that's why she can speak without letting her words falter too much. Without having to remark head on about the strangeness of this act.

"No fire either, just a water bottle and weapons."
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (You know that there’s no place for us)

Re: Disciple

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-22 07:15 pm (UTC)(link)
She's already making plans, cutting off parts of her shirt with chipped claws and fashioning some bandage. That's as far as she's gotten in her head when he starts making suggestions. Her minds wraps around that fuzzily, sifting through the implications. Wait, why does he care, what wait--

Grab onto his shoulder? If she can watch the debate, he can see the wheels turn as she tries to decide what is safest. If he's safe. Numbers is safety, always. Two is better than one and one is the worst, she's known it since wrigglerhood, scolded wordlessly into her head but she ignores it so often that she can't be sure. Is he safe.

Can she trust him? Does she have a choice. Smell will bring all sorts of things, the tang of blood on the air. She wobbles, grabs his arm and shakes her head.

"You're too tall for this shit." Shoulder at least. Hand maybe. It just reinforces that voice in her head that warns her against this.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (Forged for the peace)

Re: Disciple

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-22 08:20 pm (UTC)(link)
"Don't be an asshole to the cullworthy troll if you're going to help her, it sends mixed messages." She sounds annoyed but tired, exasperated. It's just too much to deal with, all of this. The world is making her anxious in a way she's never really felt before and the pain throbs with the beat of her bloodpusher.

"I'll hang on and shit, just--" She pauses, shifting to look at him, "What--fine, I won't touch him? I don't cull anyways, we both know that."

Whomever he has kept away, she'll stay away from. Maybe it's Psiionic. Wait, didn't he die? She furrows her brow, trying to think past the fuzziness. She can't remember. She shakes her head, only to feel the dizziness overwhelm her as blood pooled beneath her leg.

"I won't, promise."

This is the dumbest thing she's ever done.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (The happily dull Grecian eyes)

i lack an appropriately crazed laughter icon

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-22 11:34 pm (UTC)(link)
She doesn't reply, trying to find her balance. It's an awkward strange sort of gait, an awkward strange sort of picture and she laughs, in a way that almost sounds like a sob as she remembers two arenas ago. Arm broken and nails painted indigo with blood. What a picture they must make. The absurdity of it all must be amazing to the Capitol. What a turnaround.

All of them wondering what happened between the last arenas to mark this change. Her heads ducks and she laughs. It hurts less when she laughs. When she doesn't think about the hunk of flesh she's missing and more about the troll hobbling her along to safety.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (You know that there’s no place for us)

clearly

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-23 12:48 am (UTC)(link)
The laughter quiets as they draw closer to buildings. Even in her state, she's been a hunter too long to draw undue attention. There could be people in the shadows, in the trees. Around a corner or in the spaces she cannot see. Her body vibrates with the urge to twist and turn, look and see, to hunt and--no. Lethargy, exhaustion, the inability to move on her own, it wins over the bloodlust that suddenly boils.

She squashes it down and looks ahead. Swallowing her discomfort and fear at entering the domain of a clown--that's another thing entirely. Her body stiffens as they wander through empty halls back back. The gate especially makes her pause, pull back. It's not an empty room this time but the person she'll be locked inside with doesn't seem any less strange.

The boy is familiar. A face she saw across a pool, in peaceful sleep, nothing like this. Hollow face, hollow eyes. It reminds her of a person she saw in the mist--one she had ran from. No one she'd known but...

"...Descendant?" Because it had to be, if she'd met the Beforus one, this must be the other. Ever sign a trio it seemed.

"What's wrong with him?"
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (But hold me fast; Hold me fast)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-23 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
She settles her bag onto the ground and just collapses beside it. Her arm hurts from the strange position but what stretching she can do doesn't help much. It's a vague whisper in the roar of her leg to be honest, she can barely feel it. Her eyes crawl over Gamzee, the strange poison in her mind thumping away beside a rush of pain. It'd be simple, easy, quick--and she thrusts it down. Is her mind going, to be thinking these thoughts? She doesn't know.

"If they did that to my lusus, I've not seen it." Of course, she could have missed them. Thought they were a beast, ran away. More importantly, she does not speak of the things they both know. Cullbait indeed, her and him, the pair he is keeping hidden from the danger.

"Do you think they're waiting for you to prove this a trap or something silly? Like you use traps. Subjuggulators don't use traps, they kill first, ask questions later. I mean, you ask more questions than most, but traps aren't your style. If you wanted me dead, you'd have me dead. So I bet they're confused. Waiting to see what happens."

She's rambling, skin pale and clammy. A human might be dead by now but she's still clinging to life with stubbornness. For now. Sudden dismemberment still has an effect.

Her eyes meet his, trails back down to the items and she tries to quirk a smile. She's had pain. It'd pass. Probably.

"Got anything to bite on. I'll be loud if you burn my wound shut."
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (It will be dashed on the shore)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-26 03:15 am (UTC)(link)
"That's what I meant! The whole--tricking people shit. Like leading me out of the woods with freaking breadcrumbs and bringing me to your hive just snap my neck--no way. Break a few legs, drag me to question, stuff like that. Stuff you guys did--oh! I'm betting they were expecting it cause it's something they might do. Like that freaking fake in the first arena." Well her first arena. Either way, that idea connects and trails down a whole network of murderous rebellious thoughts. It concerns her less and less that those thoughts were buried, buried so far down she forgot she was capable of them.

The burning in her brain leaps, then cools again. It's a wonderful terrible feeling, distracts her from the pain, but she pushes it back again, tighter tighter into a space she doesn't acknowledge. Far.

When his eyes meet hers again, her mouth tilts in a half smirk, eyes almost losing their daze.

"I'm more likely to try to claw your eye out if I can't move. Holding me down is just a recipe for long scratches you'll have trouble explaining. Ask Signless."

Then she laughs, a snort somewhere in there.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (We are Greeks in the age of Rome)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-26 03:43 am (UTC)(link)
She smirks, laughing harder now. His reaction just makes it better, it seems, like a wriggler who's heard about pailing for the first time.

"It's a very natural part of life. Clawing the shit out of someone whilst pailing," She starts peeling back the cloth around her open wound and all laughter in her voice dies, "Shit--stop getting stuck."

It's a long moment before she can speak, because she's holding her breath now, pulling fine pieces of thread from dried blood. Her teeth ache when she finally relaxes enough to pull the jacket closer.

"I've changed my mind, I might claw you anyways," She tries to joke, pressing her back flat against the wall, "Okay. Okay."

Jacket bit down upon, hands flat on the floor, eyes pointedly not facing that deadeyed descendant or the troll about to give her more pain than she cares to think about. All in the name of survival. Sometimes, she thinks in a brief moment of clarity, she wishes she could just let it go and die without spending far too much energy clinging to life.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (but we carry on our backs the burden)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-26 05:49 am (UTC)(link)
Things blurred when he lifted her leg. It hurts, still bleeding and still a bright sharp pain where his fingers touch nerves too close to the area for comfort. She doesn't watch, doesn't want to see the thing happen. Doesn't want to see flesh boil, bubble, burn.

So the searing pain is surprising and immediate. It's like nothing else in her life, a burn so intense she can't think, can't breathe. Nostrils flare, her mouth bites down on cloth not made to handle sharp fangs tearing into it. Her whole body jerks, spasms, kicks and arches out in an attempt to be free of this horror. She has to force herself to take a breath, one, two, three.

The pain is so intense that she doesn't realize what a mistake she's made until she feels tears threaten to fall.

She can't breathe properly and the smell is settling in her hair, her nose, all parts of her smell like death and terror and she can't breathe.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (but we carry on our backs the burden)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-26 06:29 am (UTC)(link)
She can't, she can't focus, because when she does, she just smells death and destruction and her life falling into pieces. She doesn't want to be here, she doesn't want to be doing this and selfishly, she doesn't want it to be him. She doesn't want to admit this pain or this trauma to him. It's too close, cutting into things she doesn't think he knows and things she doesn't care to tell.

She screams around her gag, tears streaming down her face as she tries. Tries not to move, tries not to think. Her gut turns over, unhappy, but she can't do that right now. She'll choke, die. She doesn't want to die but she doesn't want to live, not with this searing pain. Not with the smell in the air and her matesprit dying in her minds eye, over and over.

And as abruptly as it started, it stops. Oh the pain doesn't really stop, never really ends, but the intensity fades and she can breath again. Before he can protest, she pulls the gag free and coughs, taking deep shuddering breaths. She feels like she must look terrible. Tearstreaked and trembling, she buries her face in her hands and shakes her head.

"I can't do this. I can't."
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (And hold me fast)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-26 07:00 am (UTC)(link)
She doesn't reply, staring at a spot on the wall like it's all that matters. He's right. It won't last forever. She's drawing beasts with every scream, with every pump of blood on the floor. She's faced down beasts many times her size, lived through the death or destruction of the people she cared for, watched her matesprit die before her more than once. Died herself. She can do this.

She looks at the candle and hesitantly at the burned mass at the end of her leg. It hurts. It hurts on more levels than he probably understands. Seeing it only makes it worse and she tosses her head back, hits it hard against the wall and can't even make herself wince. Voices are probably telling the story of his execution with relish, telling them why she's in such a panic. She swallows hard. She's not a tragic wounded thing.

"Just--just do it then." She grabs the jacket back close, finding a fresh spot and biting down hard. This time she watches his horns, not him, not what he's doing, but having something to focus on keeps her locked in reality at least.
disciplewhomsignlessloves: (And we will hang hang hang)

[personal profile] disciplewhomsignlessloves 2014-06-26 05:25 pm (UTC)(link)
She watches the curve of his horns tilt and dip as he moves and the pain is back, as abrupt and terrible as she remembered, only worse somehow. Somehow it never gets easier, she never acclimates, it's always a burning bright pain. It's bright and fierce and she can feel her whole body ache with the tension of holding herself together.

She's trembling, trying her best not to scream, not to cry. Her nails dig into the floor, pulling up splinters. It doesn't work, she still screams, but she refuses to cry. She's better, stronger, tougher than this. She's a better troll than the Capitol makes her out to be. She's a tougher troll. The smell in the air makes her want to claw herself free, curl in, wait for death to come, but she's stronger than her fears and her anguish. Than the nausea boiling up inside of her.

Afterwards, she promises herself. Afterwards, when the pain is over. Will the pain ever be over? Will he ever stop. A thought--kill him for the pain, murder--and she shakes her head hard. It's just the pain, just the horror, just her old hatred welling up. Stronger than her base instincts. Stronger.

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